The Data Suggest

Longitudinal studies conducted during the past 37 years indicate that as sexual activity declines, real and/or perceived cellulite buildup increases. These findings corroborate anecdotal evidence; the data also suggest that the number of cats one lives with corresponds negatively to estimated chances of impregnation and childbearing (when ovaries are fully functional). Similarly, feline cohabitation is the approximate inverse to the average number of random or planned sexual partners over a given 7-year period. Cohabitation is predicted to continue, with cat populations likely increasing over time.