"Welcome to my world ..."

In an effort to remain true to the spirit of this post, I will refrain from adding to it any original thoughts or ideas. Rather, let this be an arena in which I may flaunt (and flout) my dillettantish ways and delusions of grandeur, as well as my intellectual stagnation: blogging conveniently supercedes any real work, and consumes hours of my life without my actually achieving anything. If none of this makes any sense to you whatsoever, consider yourself lucky. On the other hand, if you're reading this, then you should already understand, in your heart of hearts, what I mean.
"We have so much time and so little to see. Wait a minute ... strike that ... reverse it ... thank you."

Pedantius speaks for himself, literally:

PEDANTIUS DISCUSSES HIMSELF

INDIGNATION Ignoramus will not rule by himself.
BATTISM I shall be Roscius, but I also once was Roscius before.
CHRONOLOGY I, Pedantius, lived forty years ago.
PARONOMY I lived, and I spoke to the Cambridge theater’s cheering.
CONFESSION Now in lieu of the stage, a printed copy is in the works
PARONOMY (for I still owe jests to my playful Muses).
APOSTROPHE I come forth, I greet the reader instead of the spectator.
COMPARISON Here there is a greater wealth of words in my diction.
METAPHOR And if Dromodotus does not equal him with his barbarous whirlwind,
MIMESIS at least he will surpass him in his formal points.
COMPARISON Our Lydia is prettier than Rosabella,
DECORUM And with me for a teacher, Ignoramus learns how to chat up a sweetheart,
RHYTHM and utter entreaties with resounding verse,
POLYSYNDETON and cheat, and swindle, and ensnare.
GOLDEN VERSE The law of the stage gives the laurel to Pedantius.